People Are Often Bitches!

People Can Be Ruthless at Times

With no consideration for the future                                                                       or Karmic Law.  BUYER BEWARE!

So sorry to be negative but I need to vent.  My daughter and me got ripped off by an “Acceptance Now” salesman at HHGregg. Usually the deal on rental/purchase agreements are you pay in 90 days and there is little to no interest.  “Just like Cash” they advertise.  I have purchased from them before and everything went smoothly.  I paid the balance off in time and had little interest.  However that waswit a different sales person.

Continue reading “People Are Often Bitches!”

2015 International Convention of Alcoholics Anonymous

Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. has not approved, endorsed, or reviewed this website, nor is it affiliated with it, and the ability to link to A.A.’s site does not imply otherwise.

2015 International Convention
of Alcoholics Anonymous
July 2-5, 2015 – Atlanta, Georgia
The 2015 International Convention of Alcoholics Anonymous will be held July 2 – 5, 2015 in Atlanta, Georgia with the theme “80 Years – Happy, Joyous and Free.” A.A. members and guests from around the world will celebrate A.A.’s 80th year with Big Meetings held Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday morning in the Georgia Dome. Other meetings, scheduled or informal, will take place throughout the weekend in the Georgia World Congress Center and local hotels.
Registration will be available on site at the Georgia World Congress Center.
We know you are excited about the 2015 International Convention and eager for information

http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/2015-international-convention-of-alcoholics-anonymous

 

BECOME A DRUG ABUSE COUNSELOR, FIND OUT HOW AT THIS LINK.  http://collegedirectory.org/lp75/index.aspx?ct2=123&source=942859&cid=4281&source3=substanceabuse123lp75&source2=newbetests820&path=ap

 

 

 

 

http://collegedirectory.org/lp75/index.aspx?ct2=123&source=942859&cid=4281&source3=substanceabuse123lp75&source2=newbetests820&path=ap

Jesus is the Cure

John 3:16

“For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life!”

 

Read “THE DREADED SIN OF FORNICATION” by Laura Edgar

This is one chapter from the book “Paradise for the Hellbound”  Read the first 4 chapters free here.      http://www.recoveryfarmhouse.com/paradise-hellbound-laura-edgar/             But first read

“THE DREADED SIN OF FORNICATION”

FACING MARRIAGE OR THE DREADED SIN OF FORNICATION

I was delivered by God from heroin and cocaine addiction by receiving prayer in a little Baptist Church from five or so parishioners including the preacher.  At that time my life changed dramatically and so I was born of Spirit or born-again as the expression goes.

Not terribly long after my born again experience which by the way included; water baptism, baptism of the Holy Spirit and I’m sure the baptism of fire (Luke 3:16).  (All the Christian credentials).  I met another Christian I liked very much that was quite an attraction for me.  I was single, young, impressionable, and very much desired to live by the rules.  We dated for a short time.  I believed in sexual abstinence before marriage because that’s how I understood the rule in the Bible.  I believed God wanted me celibate and had gone a year with no romantic relationships (a very strange concept to most people I think).  However I had such strong passionate desire for this man I felt I had better marry him before I commit the dreaded sin of fornicationAfter all God had saved me from drugs and alcohol.  I didn’t realize it at the time but I felt obligated as if now I owed God my obedience.   I felt as if there were strings attached to my deliverance I did not have a pure understanding of God’s grace and Love. I was viewing a spiritual even from a carnal and earthly standpoint

 

I was totally frustrated with abstaining from sex.  Between my unreasonable fear of God and my raging hormones I was about to make a huge mistake.  My solution for my overwhelming frustration and fear was to get married and so I did.  Not long after our union my young and handsome husband began popping Xanax and drinking in excess.  He stopped working and became very much an obnoxious drunk.

 

I have learned the doctrine of marriage from attending various Christian churches.  Some teach that I should have actually submitted to my husband and stay married.  I was attending Narcotics Anonymous and still newly sober.  Some churches will callously dis-fellowship or excommunicate a woman by disciplinary council for divorcing her husband under any circumstances.  Biblical teachings on this subject can be misunderstood resulting in oppressive beliefs and doctrines.  Some church members said I should have persistently prayed for my will to happen in my husband’s life meaning, for God to change him into what I want him to be and now!  I could have wasted away praying for his transformation all the while living a life of servitude to a drunk.   I would have been mourning and grieving daily about my husband.  Me miraculously set free only to put myself back into bondage to an unfulfilled unreasonable expectation.

I recognize my readers may not agree with all I am writing.  Christian divorce is a very sticky subject.  As the preachers declare, “Sin to one may not be sin to another” I have found this to be true.

I married so I could Biblically and lawfully have sexual relations against the advice of my spiritual teachers.  I married hastily not knowing the man well enough or long enough.  Most people are on their best behavior when courting for the first 90 days.

Marriage is many good things but it is confined by intention when thought of as only a solution to sexuality.  I quickly divorced Slim.  I had not considered his well-being when I married him.  I had ignored the glaring red flags I saw in my soon to be husband so I could get what I wanted.  The union was based on selfishness.  I broke the marriage vow and regretted the entire incident.

 

 

Should I have stayed in the marriage and sinned by self-induced oppression?  Or should I have sinned by divorce and breaking a marriage vow?  I deduced that I should not, by God live in my sinful mistake the rest of my life.  The worse sin would have been rejecting my freedom to Love by staying with a man in a graceless institution by my immature ignorance of the higher law of Love.

 

Mathew 5:32

“But I say unto you whosoever put away his wife saving for the cause of fornication causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever marry her that is divorced commit adultery.”

 

What does this scripture really mean?  It is saying God’s law is higher than man’s law is it not.  Even if the woman in the scripture was legally divorced, she still commits adultery states Jesus.  The Judge signed the divorce decree, put his state seal on it and yet in Gods eye she is still obligated to her first husband.  God’s law prevails.  His law deems the divorce occurred for the wrong reasons, only infidelity it declares will allow such a separation and freedom to unite with another person.

 

My question is this; are your beliefs in traditional marriage so lawfully bound that there is no allowance for grace?  Does forgiveness stop when we consider the laws of marriage?  I do not think that is what Jesus really meant.  Mathew 15:1-9 talks about the scribes and Pharisees who asked Jesus

 

“Why do your disciples transgress the tradition of the elders?”  Jesus answered: “Why do you also transgress the commandment of God because of tradition”

 

In my ignorance and fear of breaking traditional biblical law, I abandoned and breached the higher law of Love.  I placed my fear of the law first and married with selfish motives in my heart.  The act of sin to one may not be sin to another because of the motives of one’s heart.  Certainly, the act of marriage in of itself is not a sin but I believe it may be a sin depending on our heart.

 

Suppose I help someone because of the kindness of my heart and Love.  Later I help someone again this time I’m doing it because they have something I want and I’m trying to manipulate them into giving it to me, I covet and lie to get what I want.  Two of the same deed one sin, one Love.  Indubitably, a big chocolate cake is not sinful but to the obese man it could be the tool of his self-destructive demise.  In his heart, he lusts for it putting it before God, man and himself.  The cake rules him it is his god.  What about TV do I put it before my family and God?  The same rule applies, what is in my heart?

 

Hebrews 4:12

“For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of thoughts and intents of the heart.”

 

 

 

Mathew 15:8

“These people draw near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.”

 

Mathew 5:8

“Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God.”

Romans 10:10

“For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made to salvation.”

We have biblically established that what is in our hearts is the bottom line with God unto life and salvation.  Given this knowledge,

I would like to be capable of placing with my hand what goes in and what comes out of my heart thank you!  More self-sufficiency, Please!

Self-sufficiency does not jive with the realm of The Spirit.  Let’s examine the fornication issue a little further.  Suppose on the flip side I meet that special man of God.  A man of God, meaning he lives by the golden rule.  This is the man I have been praying for, the man I want for my life partner.

We make a promise of fidelity to each other and keep it.  We embark on a long loving relationship free of guilt and shame.  We consider each other before ourselves often.

We do not legally marry or vow a vow because we are unsure of what tomorrow may bring and we have both been married before.  Would I be living in sin?  Would I be fornicating?  I think not.  Our motives are pure and within the boundaries of Gods higher law of Love.

Some men asked God this question,

Mathew 22:36-40

“Teacher which is the greatest commandment in the law?  Jesus said to him “You shall

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your mind.

This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it,

Love your neighbor as yourself.  On these two commandments hang all the
Law and the Prophets.”

 

My point liberally spoken as it may be is if the motive in my heart is pure and my actions Loving, traditional do’s and don’ts are not relevant.  Moreover, this child of God is not bound by their meticulous and complicated tuition.  Some may call these traditions religious bondage.  Fornication as I understand it is committing a wrong act done out of twisted immoral motivation, selfish in nature and hurtful to people.  Love cannot fornicate, only God can see my heart and yours.  Setting moral boundaries for me and identifying what is and what is not sin for me is one crucial ingredient of my spiritual maturity.  No one else can decide how I abide in good conscience toward God except me.

 

A proverb written by a friend of mine reads, “Of guilt I can’t relieve you though you’re sorry and I believe you.”  So often, when we go against our own beliefs and convictions (otherwise known as apostasy) we seek justification and approval from others.  These confirmations give us temporary relief from inner guilt but do not cleanse our soul.  Justification distracts us from our guilt and turns it to blame.  Blame being a much easier emotion for our egos to handle.  However, our hearts suffer the loss.  Unchecked guilt usually results in self-hatred and snowballs into various sin.  A little guilt can spin into more wrong action and create a downward spiral toward Hell.

 

Another spiritual succubus is un-forgiveness.  Un-forgiveness also lives in our hearts and minds causing negative action due to negative feelings.  I believe if we could see spiritual entities, these emotions such as guilt, hatred, blame etc. would appear as black clouds going down into the pit of our stomachs (like the graphic illustrations of disease in the movie “The Green Mile”) and if unchecked, fill our bodies to the brim resulting in feelings that are unbearable.  These feelings often spill over in a bad way.  These individual sins should be checked daily and confessed to God and man.

 

The bottom line of my message to you is illustrated here so perfectly in First Corinthians.

 

First Corinthians 6:12-15

“All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient: All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.  Meats for the belly and the belly for meats but God shall destroy both it and them.  Now the body is not for fornication, but for the Lord and the Lord for the body.”

AMEN

 


IS LAUGHTER AND CELEBRATION ALWAYS A SIGN OF “QUALITY SOBRIETY”?

WHILE SADNESS AND GRIEVING ARE A SIGN OF WORKING A BAD PROGRAM?

 

Depression is often repressed anger that lacks enthusiasm, 12 step action should be taken to fend depression off.  But also a deep emotional process of cries, guttural-outbursts, writing, sharing, moaning, and screaming needs to take place to release the emotional pangs misery that encompass the feelings of the adult who missed out on emotional Love and nurture while growing up.  “

 

Oh wouldn’t it be nice to feel totally secure & happy, with not a fear.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be aware of our own mortality and yet not fear the unknown when it confronts us?    Isn’t the happiest person in recovery synonymous with the most spiritual man in recovery?  But wait…truly any man facing his own reality on this Earth with eyes wide-open should be afraid.  There are entirely too many horrible things that can happen.  There are too many terrible things that WILL HAPPEN…THAT IS, IF WE LIVE LONG ENOUGH TO EXPERIENCE THEM. 

 

Don’t you just love those drug company commercials that relentlessly remind us of the many horrible illnesses that could befall us as we walk into our twilight years?   Struggling as we go to fend off the Alzheimer’s and decomposition?  Or how about the endless ads in the mail once we hit the magic age of 50 for final expense and burial insurance.  Or how about the progressive memory loss and thinning hair line?  Just to name a few…the better we are at “denial” of all this reality the happier we may be.  And isn’t denial dishonest at its core and contrary to every Twelve Step principal we have learned? 

 

Nevertheless, however rewarding our pleasant & various distractions from our sickening reality may be these pleasantries may not be in OUR OWN best interest.   Staying in the house of gaiety, celebration, and gratitude may seem like our highest achievement in recovery not to mention how we do enjoy appearing [above it all] to our fellows.   After all doesn’t our happiness prove that we are working the best program out there? 

 

In spite of the world-renowned 12 step solution of teaching us to grab pencil and paper to write down all the things we are so wonderfully thankful for, at the on-set of any signs of ill-at-ease.  Beware this 12 step solution may NOT always be [the-next-right-thing]. 

 

We may be experiencing on-going discontent and irritability for a very important reason.  Our discontent could be our call or the only thing that draws us to our higher power.  Perhaps instead of distracting ourselves from our sadness we should be accepting, owning it, then we should take a much closer look at the reality of our own impending doom as mortals.  This wake-up call per-say could be so we will seek GOD the lasting solution rather than repeated and temporary Band-Aids that we stick on our skin while under the surface we deteriorate along with our soul’s spirituality.

 

King Solomon the wisest man of all time has written a message to us:

 

Ecclesiastes 7:2-4

 

“It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of everyone; the living should take this to heart.

 

Sorrow is better than laughter,

For by a sad countenance the heart is made better.

 

The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of pleasure.”

 

Gotta feel to heal and gotta seek God diligently to find.

STEP ELEVEN
STEP ELEVEN

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES

Birds of a feather flock together…

So they say.  CHOOSE YOUR COMPANIONS WISELY.

EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES ARE REAL AND THEY ARE RUNNING RAMPANT IN THE ROOMS OF AA!

Two important rules-of-thumb; if they gossip about other people to you then they gossip about you to others.  Number two, “Know people by who they show you they are not by who they tell you they are.”

 What is an “emotional vampire?”  An emotional vampire doesn’t know that they are sucking strength and peace from those around them.  They simply have an inherent ability to push your emotional buttons.  They can trigger in us the emotion of struggle and control accompanied by anger. Intolerance and a general negative excitement of sorts is what they bring out in us.  Or put plainly they easily rile-us-up by their conversation.  

Yes this sounds dangerously close to the “blame-game” however its something different.  Once we are aware that certain people have this effect on us we can avoid them…we don’t invite them into our homes.  Now if everyone pisses us off and we label the whole world, ’emotional vampire’ then we may lack the ability to take responsibility for your own feelings.  Some people are just sand-paper to us.

Other people CAN CHANGE THE COARSE OF OUR LIVES.   I asked my partner “why is it that I seem to absorb the people that I hang around.”  When I spend time with my sister, as neurotic and confused as she is I part her company with a negative attitude and often-times I am critical of her.  Whether we get along with, like, or dislike our neighbors we always take something away from our interaction with them.   Perhaps that is partly one of the spiritual answers to “why” the 12 step programs work.  We as humans need one another to spiritually & emotionally feed, nurture and stimulate us.  We are as one, every man woman and child on this earth is our brother & sister.

 

Ya, ya, ya but where is the wisdom in this well-founded theory that we are all one?  The wisdom is to open our minds and channel-in beneficial information from our positive friends and neighbors.  And to hear with our hearts which direction we should go to find the humans that feed us Love.  Time & chance figure into many aspects of our reality, don’t believe them for a minute when they echo in your ears “THERE ARE NO COINCIDENCES.”   Really?  So if every little thing that happens on the face of this big earth is planned out by the creator then all is “providence.” In which case, we are all robots anyway so we may as well hang up our hats and go to sleep in the back seat of the car…and stay asleep.  NO!  Sorry I don’t buy it.  If the word ‘never’ or ‘always’ is in the sentence its usually inaccurate.  As the great & wise “Preacher” King Solomon said in Ecclesiastes: “Time & chance play a part in everything!”  Amen Solomen!

 “I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.”

 The kinds of people to avoid are the negative, soul sucking emotional vampires that will never be filled no matter how many victims they suck into their lair.  But really these are just sick people, the complainers, the antagonizers, the creators of Kayos!  Those that will stab us in the back as soon as we get half-way turned around.  These are the ones that although they are a great distraction from our own pain we will have to detox from them once we break away from them.

 We may feel an emotional hangover because of the way that they draw out our own lower, negative nature.  This is not a blame tactic, we are always responsible for our own actions including choosing our company.  In simple English they tempt us to act out in some character defect…usually gossip so we have to work harder when we are around them to keep our side of the street clean.

 BUT WAIT!  Let’s talk about these more Loving less fearful people that seldom engage in kayos and the manufacturing of misery.  When we spend time with these people they encourage us.  We open up to them because we feel comfortable talking to them, they don’t seek to find the wrong in everything we share.   We share our worries and they are understanding and quick to remind us that we are good people.  “Encouragement” is not a four letter word even if it seems that way in certain cultures.    When we walk away from these people we feel strengthened, we feel validated, we ask ourselves why we don’t see these people more often.  As providence has it I believe God puts certain people in our lives so we have half a chance to survive.  IF YOU DON’T HAVE A PERSON IN YOUR LIFE LIKE THIS THEN IT’S TIME TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE AND GO TO A MEETING.

 

Put Two Irons In The Fire

Put two Irons in the fire, meaning work at two different goals who knows which one will pay off.

 

Ecclesiastes 11:6
“Sow your seed in the morning, and at evening let your hands not be idle, for you do not know which will succeed, whether this or that, or whether both will do equally well.”

I Love reading the words of The Preacher in Ecclesiastes. Who knows if it was The Great King Solomon who wrote all of the book. Scholars are uncertain of the books author. It is important when beginning a life of sobriety to set long term goals and to have more than one goal. An idle mind gives us time to obsess on ourselves and grow fear in our minds. When we have hope for the future we do the work and put the outcome in God’s capable hands.

Diligent work is what brings success. Consistency with our projects is also a key to success. The open-mindedness that we learn by working the 12 steps carries into all aspects of our work and our play. Keeping an open mind is akin to creativity and creation is a godly quality.

We should be sure to have at least one creative outlet of music, literature, art, these wonderful creations of God when practiced for entertainment will bring us joy. A consistent work ethic is good but we mustn’t neglect our times of play. Go swimming, barbaque at a park, go to the beach, ride a bike, buy a motorcycle and travel.

And like Solomon (we think) said, put more than one iron in the fire who knows which one will burn hotter. We in recovery tend to work for ourselves and have our own businesses. Perhaps because of our rebellious nature’s when we were out there. Or maybe it’s because we are free thinkers and are good at finding ways to get what we want. Bless God and thank Him/Her/It that we have the ability to work some are unable and suffer for it.